Puppy!!

The puppy is getting bigger and more feisty!! She has decided that socks from the laundry room are her toys and the cat is really fun to bounce around and bother. Poor Napolean :(

But she is super cute and very patient with me right now. She goes into her crate perfectly whenever I need her to. Other then a little whining when she goes in, she's pretty good about it. She has the cutest bark it is this really low "woooof". It almost sounds like a burst of air coming out of her because it's low and you can barely hear it.

So she's adorable and I still heart her! Yay!



Do I have something on my face?







Playing in the snow.







In WI.










In WI. She was looking out the screen porch at someone outside.











Sniffing for the pine comb (she doesn't have a very good nose)







Playing with a pine comb






Does my Butt look big?

stupid body

So...the endometriosis is back. This blog entry is not for people who can't handle hearing about girly issues.
It's back in full force. It decided to ruin my weekend of bliss out in Wisconsin last weekend. It made me so tired, I slept for an entire day last week. And my body could barely move for another two days. The only reason I got out of bed and went for walks was because I have a puppy who needs it. Thank heavens for that puppy or I would be in a low place right now. It made my stomach believe it wasn't really a stomach and made my colon think it was working when in fact it was not. It congested my body, has made my heart rate uncontrolable and it has made me moody, annoyed at everything, and seriously delusional (not in a crazy way, just a PMS sort of way). My body is seriously stupid.
Sooo...tomorrow I go in for a lupron shot. For those of you who don't know what that is, it means I am getting serious drugs pumped into my body so that it will stop the endometriosis from growing and give my immune system time to go in, wherever it is (cause we don't know), and fight it. To do this, it sends my body into a pre-menopausal state. Which means I will probably get hot flashes, be moody, I have to take hormones (because my body won't produce them) to help fight these symptoms. This is how my body will be for the next six months. It kind of sucks. I'm not gonna lie.
But the alternative is another laparoscopy. Or birth control. Another laparoscopy is ridiculous because the lupron does the same thing. It can even fight the endometriosis in places my docotor couldn't (like if it is attached to my colon, which there is a really good chance it is because of my symptoms and we found abrasions, or scar tissue, on my colon in the last laparoscopy.) My doctor can't laser it off there because she could hurt my colon, so lupron would be a better choice if that is the case. It apparently likes my colon. Yay for me. Birth control would not fight it quickly enough. So imagine really intense nausea for like six months while the birth control tries to fight off the endometriosis. I want the nausea gone TODAY!
So, I realize this is a sensitive subject and not everyone wants to hear about it. But it's happening to me and I feel like if I write it down, it's not so bad. And then it's out there in this internet abyss and people can read it and other women who have been through the same thing or have felt the way I do can relate to me and my stupid body.
It sucks though because I am 26 years old. I got sick a little before my 23rd birthday. I've lived most of my twenties being sick and your twenties are supposed to be the best years where you have adventures and you travel and you do things you've never done before and define who you are and what you want to do with your life. I feel like I got a little ripped off. My twenties are soon to be over and I feel like it wasn't what I wanted it to be. But in other ways I feel like being sick has made me more empathetic, and kind, and closer to my Heavenly Father in ways I never knew imaginable.
So...I'm thinking the trade off was worth it...most days :)

Getting Lost!

So, I am directionally impaired. I am not joking. Everywhere I go, I get lost. If you don't believe me, ask the guy at the gas station in Miami where I had to pull over and ask for directions, or one of the many people I asked directons from in Boston, Minneapolis. Just the other night I got lost in Minneapolis! Minneapolis! My home city! It's pretty pathetic. I got GPS on my phone when I lived in Boston just so I wouldn't have to pull over and ask for directions anymore. Or my other routine is I get so turned around that I pull over, have a good cry, and then figure out where I am and find my way home. When I lived in Boston, this happened on like a daily basis the first six months. The rest of the time it still happened at least a few times a month :)
So, I was out in Wisconsin this past weekend with some friends at a cabin and I needed to take my dog on a walk. I had walked on the trail around the lake once before but I was with people. This time I was alone and got turned around on one of the trails and ended up 3 and 1/2 miles away from where I was supposed to be on some random road. I thought about turning around in the trail but the woods were freaking me out and I didn't want to get lost going back. So I pulled out my iphone and was able to map where I was and where I wanted to be. (Thanks heavens I remembered the address of the cabin!). I was 3 1/2 miles away and the only thing I could do was walk it. So, I walked back to the cabin and poor Nori went through all of this with me. I don't know if she will ever trust my direction as dog walker ever again!
I'm just so glad my iphone worked out in the boonies of Bruce, WI and I could find my way back. Whew!